Two Brooklyn therapists, Signe Simon and Simone Humphrey, interview psychologists, astrologers, researchers, and more to find out the hidden wisdom around all things love and sex.
Ep. 20 — DIRTY LOLA — A Lesson in BDSM
Dirty Lola is a sex educator, storyteller, and creator of Sex Ed A Go-GO, a live sex Q&A talk show performed regularly in NYC and taken around the country. She teaches sex education at conferences, universities, and you can find her behind the counter at Shag, a sex shop in Brooklyn. In this fun and at times provocative interview, Lola teaches us all about kink and BDSM, what it means to experience pleasure through pain, and the potential for empowerment and healing in submission to a partner. She shares with us her personal journey of discovering her sexuality, sex ed growing up in the south, how she cultivated her own body and sex positivity, and her introduction into to kink and polyamory.
Ep. 19 — Jette Simon — Words of Wisdom from Mom
Jette Simon is a Danish clinical psychologist with over 30 years of experience working with couples from around the world. She is an Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy trainer and Director of the Washington DC Training Institute for Couples Therapy and EFT Institute in Copenhagen. She’s also Signe’s mom! In this personal interview with us from 2017, she shares insights from her past romantic relationships and her clinical work with couples. We talk about what makes for a good relationship, the function of affairs, cultural norms, and starter marriages. Jette also offers up some motherly words of wisdom that can help anyone maintain hope after a break up or improve their current relationship.
Ep. 18 — Cycles and Sex — Women, Sex, and Tech: Part II
This is the second episode in our series on women, sex, and tech. We are strong supporters of female entrepreneurs, as ones ourselves, and it’s been so exciting to pick the brains of like minded women who are dedicated to spreading sex education and promoting sexual wellness. Our guest today is the cofounder of Cycles and Sex, an education platform to teach people about their bodies. With an emphasis on the reproductive cycle and sexual wellness, Cycles and Sex is a company whose mission is provide accessible information that is often taboo or shaming. It is a sex positive, body affirming platform that covers topics from pregnancy, birth control, hormones, sex-ed, and menstruation. All the questions that many of us have and we’re not often told.
Ep. 17 — EFFY BLUE — A GUIDE TO POLYAMORY
In this engaging interview, polyamory expert and coach, Effy Blue, talks to us about what makes for successful poly relationships and how to decide whether a polyamorous lifestyle is right for you. Effy shares her personal journey from monogamy to polyamory and offers up lots of practical advice about everything from talking to your monogamous partner about polyamory, how to think about scheduling poly relationships, and effective communication skills. Even if you're monogamous, you might be surprised by how much there is to be learned from poly relationships.
Ep. 16 — Jacob Ham, PhD — Anger and Attachment
Dr. Jacob Ham is a clinical psychologist who specializes in working with couples and trauma. He is the director of the Center for Child Trauma and Resilience and assistant clinical professor and supervisor at Mount Sinai in New York City. This episode is a sequel to our first interview with Dr. Ham (Ep 8 - Haunted By History: Love After Trauma), where we are introduced to a couple struggling with connection in the face of jealousy. This time, we listen to segments of a subsequent therapy session and hear how their relationship unfolds, while shedding light on the ways attachment styles evolve from childhood to adult romance as well as the destructive and constructive power of anger in relationships.
Ep. 15 — Dipsea — Women, Sex, and Tech: Part I
This episode is part one of a series on women, sex, and tech. We interviewed founders, Gina Gutierrez and Faye Keegan, founders of their company Dipsea, a tech company that offers audio stories for a new platform to foster sexual wellbeing. The stories range in genre, perspective, and mood, and are designed to turn their listeners on and help them to feel sexy. We picked their brains on female sexuality and how the mind is such a crucial and often neglected form of foreplay, the excitement and challenges of starting a company, and their vision of the future of sexual wellness. This episode is not a paid sponsorship.
Ep. 14 — Sue Johnson, PhD — Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy
Dr. Sue Johnson is a clinical psychologist, researcher, and the developer of Emotionally Focused Couples and Family Therapy (EFT), a powerful model that helps couples tune into their emotions to reconnect. She is the author of the bestselling book Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, an evidenced based program to help couples build safety. Among her many accomplishments, Sue has been appointed as a Member of the Order of Canada and was named Psychologist of the Year by APA 2016. In this engaging interview on Sue's 30th wedding anniversary, she takes us on an educational journey through the science of attachment and emotion, the foundation for our romantic relationship needs.
Ep. 13 — Mark Epstein, MD — Advice from a Buddhist Psychiatrist
Mark Epstein, M.D., is a psychiatrist, speaker, and author of numerous books integrating concepts from Buddhism and psychotherapy, including Thoughts Without A Thinker, Going to Pieces Without Falling Apart, and his most recent book Advice Not Given: A Guide to Getting Over Yourself. In this insightful interview, Mark describes the ego, the ways we need it, how it gets in our way, and it’s role in romantic relationships. The goal is to change our relationship to our egos, rather than get rid of it. He discusses ways to accomplish this by applying Buddhist and psychoanalytic methods with his patients and in his personal life. We live in an era with so many distractions that fuel our anxieties, and Mark’s interview grounds us by reminding us to tap into that part of ourselves that has always been there; from birth until death.
Ep. 12 — Esther Perel — Developing Erotic Intelligence
World renowned love guru and couples psychotherapist, Esther Perel, poignantly describes the realities of romance, including infidelity and complacency in relationships. Why do we cheat even when we're in happy relationships? Can relationships be repaired after an affair? How do we maintain romantic excitement in the face of familiarity? Esther shares with us thoughtful and seductive solutions to tackle these eternal dilemmas.
Ep. 11 — Rachel and Ada — A Couple’s Trans Narrative
Simone's cousin Rachel and her girlfriend Ada visit LOVELINK to talk about how their relationship evolved following Ada’s gender transition. With great humor and wisdom, Rachel and Ada open up about what they’ve learned about themselves and each other through Ada’s transition, including changes in the way they connect emotionally and sexually. Regardless of how you identify, there’s a lot to be learned about love and the healing power of personal liberation from this inspiring couple.
Ep. 10 — Bill Doherty, PhD — Red Flags in Relationships
Dr. Bill Doherty, professor and director of the Minnesota Couples on the Brink Project at the University of Minnesota, gives us some solid Midwestern relationship advice. He’s worked with thousands of couples and been married 40 + years, so he knows a thing or two about what it takes to sustain long-term commitment. In this interview, he shares how he helps couples working through the often wrenching decision about whether to end a relationship. Dr. Doherty also walks us through his list of red flags to look for when dating and what people should probably stop stressing about. If you’re single or thinking about taking your relationship to the next level of commitment, this is a must listen episode!
Ep. 09 — Terry Real — Narcissistic Men
Terry Real, psychotherapist and founder of Relational Life Therapy, specializes in working with men, particularly narcissistic, or what he calls “grandiose” men. In this deeply informative and timely interview, Terry talks to us about the different forms of narcissism, how narcissism develops, and the ways it emerges in relationships. In an era with Donald Trump as our leader, male narcissism rears its toxic head societally as well as within relationships, resulting in painful psychic and emotional consequences. We find out how narcissism expresses itself emotionally and sexually and ways that we can begin to deconstruct patriarchy by helping men to be more relational.
Ep. 08 — Jacob Ham, PhD — Love after Trauma
We went into the mind and psychotherapy session of Dr. Jacob Ham, a clinical psychologist who specializes in the treatment of trauma. He is the director of the Center for Child Trauma and Resilience and assistant clinical professor at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai Hospital. In our interview, he described how pain from the past affects our current relationships and ways that he helps hurt people heal interpersonal wounds and build trust and love again. To help us understand, he shared with us a recording from a real couples session that is a moving demonstration of his work and the power of couples therapy to build back healthy connection.
Follow the couple's therapeutic journey and learn more about loving through hurt on Dr. Ham's YouTube channel:
Ep. 07 — Nell Taylor — Confessions of an Online Dater
Nell is a 34-year-old designer who has extensive experience exploring online dating. Through her dating adventures, experience of numerous dating apps, and understanding texting rapport, she has guided many friends through navigating the often daunting cyber world of love. In this interview, Nell candidly opens up about the realities of online dating. Nell shares what she has learned about tolerating anxieties that get stirred up and offers practical advice for women seeking love online.
Ep. 06 — Alexandra Solomon, PhD — Love Me, Love You
Dr. Alexandra Solomon is a clinical psychologist at The Family Institute and professor at Northwestern university where she teaches the famous undergraduate course “Building Loving and Lasting Relationships: Marriage 101.” She is the author of the book Loving Bravely: Twenty Lessons of Self-Discovery to Help You Get the Love You Want. As the title suggests, Dr. Solomon explained to us in this illuminating interview how to expand your relational self-awareness so you can make healthy and conscious choices around love. She delves into the key aspects of romantic relationships including attraction, long term relational success, conflict, sex, and how to balance the choices between yourself and your partner. While this interview is particularly helpful for young adults, anyone can learn from her pearls of wisdom!
Ep. 05 — Carina Ho — Intimacy After Disability
Carina Ho is a survivor of a tragic car accident that killed her mother, caused her stepfather to suffer from a traumatic brain injury, and left her paralyzed from the chest down. Three years later, and now using a wheelchair, our guest is a full time modern dancer at AXIS Dance Company, has released her EP album Onikho, and is the most recent recipient of the Fulbright Scholarship. Several months before the accident, our guest began dating a young man whom she had met at work. Through the transition from pre accident to post accident, able bodied to disabled, our guest and her boyfriend have remained together. In our interview, Carina speaks candidly about her experience of love and sex after becoming paralyzed and how she is rediscovering her mojo. Onikho Music
Ep. 04 — Helen Fisher, PhD — The Biology of Love and Attraction
Helen Fisher, PhD, is a biological anthropologist and the chief scientific advisor to Match.com. In this illuminating interview, Dr. Fisher explains to us what happens to our brain on love or after rejection, the biological underpinnings of how we pick our partners, and takes an anthropological perspective on the ways in which online dating has formed our way of experiencing relationships. Dr. Fisher got us thinking, "Maybe love isn't such a mystery after all."
Ep. 03 — Emily Nagoski, PhD — Discovering Your Authentic Sexual Self
Emily Nagoski, PhD, is the author of New York Times best-seller “Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life.” Emily’s message is powerful to women exploring and understanding their sexuality: you are NORMAL, just as you are! As a professor at Smith College and sex educator around the country with a popular TedTalk, her mission is to help women feel confident and joy inside their bodies and with their sexuality. In our interview, Emily demystifies our sexual biology, explains the accelerators and brakes of sexual desire, what fetishes are all about, and how to come into your “authentic sexual wellbeing.”
Ep. 02 — Aaron Breslow, PhD — How to Have an Open Relationship
Columbia researcher, teacher, and therapist Aaron Breslow explains the many ways to have an open relationship, why we want them, and how heteronormative couples are starting to learn from the gay community. Aaron brings humor to the episode and his own personal experience of entering a monogamous relationship for the first time. Whether you’re already in an open relationship, are curious, or just like the fantasy of one, Aaron provides us with some thoughtful insights into making the decision to opening up a dyad.
Ep. 01 — Ian Kerner, PhD — Intercourse Discourse
Dr. Ian Kerner, psychologist, sex therapist, and author of New York Times bestseller “She Comes First,” speaks with us about the challenges couples face regarding desire and preserving sexual satisfaction in long term relationships. Dr. Kerner discusses why it’s so difficult for couples to talk about sex, what contributes to a lower libido, and the importance of erotic fantasies.