Book

The New Rules of Marriage

While this book is directed for heteronormative couples and the impact that gender norms have on relationships, Terry Real describes essential skills and clinical wisdom that can apply to every relationship. It is one of our top recommended books because it so clearly states what is okay and not okay in a healthy relationship. Most of us are seeking partners that can both be a lifelong lover as well as a companion and we need new rules for this new kind of 21st century relationship. The book is entertaining and Terry Real keeps it real (pun intended). He cuts to the chase and is direct and often confrontational with you, the reader, and his couples that he illustrates in the book: all the while still using humor to soften the blow. The book also provides exercises for you and partner to practice new ways of relating and communicating.

Terry Real

The New Rules of Marriage

Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love

We love this book because it is not your typical self-help book full of cliches. Sue Johnson integrates the science and existing body of research explaining our “primal code of attachment.” She describes the development and research of her own therapy model, Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT), and takes the reader through seven different conversations to have with your partner that is essentially a primer on the 9 steps of EFT. For couples striving for deeper connection in their romantic relationships, the book is helpful in providing exercises, examples of couples that illustrate problems and ways to address them, all the while maintaining an entertaining yet scholarly voice. Given EFT is one of the most successful forms of couples therapy, we highly recommend the book as an effective tool for you and your partner.

Sue Johnson

Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love