SAM, 30 — SINGLE
When was your relationship?
Last relationship was two years ago.
Why did it end?
It ended because things were clearly not right and I wanted to have a conversation about it. The moment those gates opened, he felt like he could be honest with me and I discovered he was never into it for the entire time. This really caught me off guard. It also revealed his emotional immaturity; like his inability to communicate.
What would you say is the best thing about dating? What are you most excited about?
Having that connection. Feeling that chemistry with someone that you haven’t felt in awhile. That’s really exciting. I think that when you find that, you want to hang onto that. But it’s also challenging.
What’s challenging about it?
Well it’s also a distraction. When you feel that chemistry it can sometimes be like a drug and all you think about and want to experience is that feeling. But then there’s also chemistry that’s just the right balance, where you can live your life and not be distracted and feel the most comfortable that you ever have. So the challenge is finding how to maintain your place in life and love. Currently, the guy that I’m seeing now has made me freak out a bit and pull back because I don’t like the fact that I’m distracted by him in the moments when I want to work and focus on myself. And I’m thinking, should I text him? Should we go on a date soon? It’s those anticipating moments that are so difficult.
If you could give one piece of advice about being single, what would it be?
I’m all about traveling solo. Spending time with yourself and being okay with it. And that’s not easy. Probably the most terrifying thing about being single is being alone, so it’s great if you can master that. I think for me, traveling has always grounded me and empowered me at the same time. Leaving a situation, getting on a plane, and going somewhere where it’s all your choice. You can go anywhere you want and not worry about somebody else. It’s great and everyone should experience that.